This is an entry for Friday Fictioneers, a 100-word challenge based on a photo. Hope you enjoy!
Lewis rubbed his hands together. Getting cold.
And Major was only getting worse.
It’d been years, since the old man had let Lewis call him Father.
Gradually, their homestead came to resemble boot camp. From Major’s fondest bygone days, in the Marines.
Being sixteen, it was fun, at first. Learning riflery and wilderness survival tactics.
But now, shivering, wearing nothing but a wife-beater and sweatpants, padlocked, like an animal, in a chicken-wire cage, the old decrepit barn wheezing around him, the mercury plummeting…
And Major, back at the house, sucking down moonshine…
Well. Escape no longer seemed like child’s play.
Oooh that’s wicked, what a terrifying tale. Loved it!!
Thank you so much!!
When he escapes, things might get REALLY ugly!
True. As pointed out in other comments, children imitate not only our virtues but our vices. And a cage that fits a sixteen-year-old can easily fit a drunken man…
This makes me think that Major is a minuscule minor in mind.
Good deduction Bjorn! Definitely not a natural at this parenting thing!
I wonder who the Major had in the other cages??
Haha! Let me go look…😊
😀
So sad, this reality for some!
Oh I hope not!
Hopefully, the training his father provided him with will assist in his escape. Well done!
Thanks Brenda!
Turning him into a tough lad might just backfire on Major in years to come.
Here’s my tale!
True, Keith!
And the worse thing is Major thinks he’s ‘toughening up’ his son… Pffft. Child abuse, for certain.
Well penned.
Thanks Dale.
Sounds to me like dear old dad has crossed from strict to insane. I hope the boy is persistent and creative enough to escape.
Me too, granonine!
Dear Andrea,
I wonder if the Major sees this as making his son tough. I see it as abuse. Gritty and well told.
Shalom,
Rochelle
Thanks Rochelle. That is the question I wanted to ask: where exactly is the line?
Oh my goodness – I hope the old boy remembers Lewis before it’s too late! Nicely written piece – I haven’t come across a garment called a Wife Beater before – the mind boggles! 🙂
Susan A Eames at
Travel, Fiction and Photos
A “wife-beater” is a sleeveless men’s undershirt. I think it’s slang in the US. Marlon Brando wore one in A Streetcar Named Desire. I don’t know how popular they are now, but I remember my grandfather wearing one. Apparently the name is less than politically correct now.
That’s the ultimate test to set a son. I’m sure Major just sees it as tough love, but I’m hoping he’ll get out of there.
Me too. I’m picturing it as late fall/early winter so whether he does or not could be decisive.
Nasty. Hopefully his father will make a mistake sooner or later, I just hope Lewis is able to take advantage and isn’t too mentally and physically beaten down. Nice one!
I’ve never had a story called nasty and nice at the same time, but thank you, draliman! If you’re rooting for the sixteen-year-old, Ive done my job.
I am! And of course I meant the situation was nasty, not your story 🙂
Oy vey …
Good story. I hope he escapes.
Me too.
Gritty and sad
Thanks Neil, I think. It’s amazing what we can accept as “normal” if we’ve grown accustomed to it.
Well that’s terrifying! I hope he gets put. The old man is reliving horrible memories but his son is suffering. Well written
I thought maybe from Major’s point of view, remembering his days in the Marines is pleasant. But not everyone would enjoy it as much Im sure.